If you have been a party girl for a significant time, going alcohol free can seem a bit daunting.

Initially you probably take a break from alcohol because you need to, because you feel like you are drinking too much, and you have found yourself asking questions like "I drink a bottle of wine every night am I an alcoholic?". Or you feel shit, sick of the hangovers, spending way too much money, the feelings of not quite remembering what happened, embarrassment, the wasted days, the list goes on.  So, you are fired up, motivated, you can do a month and you feel great.

I have been drinking too much and I want to stop. What next?

If you are used to going out every weekend and having a fully booked social calendar; this can feel like a big lifestyle change.

I know, I have been there.  Always a party to go to, always something to celebrate, often drinking too much, the whole year booked up.

When you stop usually you don’t hang out with your old friends so much....

I recently I asked my audience what can I help you with the most?

The biggest thing you want is more top tips for quitting.

I know I go on about booze a lot, for so many reasons, but essentially these tips can be translated for any substance that is causing you a problem in your life today.

I have many favourites as you know.

Eat healthy foods, don’t drink or take drugs, exercise, sleep, spend time with the people you love, laugh, be in nature.  You know all the simple things that we know work.  Fundamentals I call them.  Get your basics in place.

If you have trouble getting your basics in please work with a suitably experienced and qualified coach.  Seriously it will really help and save you so much time.

Are you ready, drum roll………

My number 1 tip for when you take a break, or stop using anything is get out there and do something different.

I mean it really.

I know it’s tough when you first stop and the last thing you want to do...

Have you have been thinking about getting help to stop drinking? Or reducing or controlling your drinking?

Or maybe it’s your partying or drug use that has got out of hand.

You don’t want to tell your doctor or maybe you have spoken to them but it wasn’t really that helpful.

Some people will just be able to stop, gain control or reduce.  There is so much information out there on how to stop drinking, but it’s hard to know who and what to listen to.

What if you can’t do it on your own, what then? There is lots of help to stop drinking available, but you have to know where to look.

When I wanted to make a change and find help to stop drinking, I was lucky there was a great trainer and therapist in my life that had already spotted me coming a mile off, so they were ready for the call.  Also, in some weird way I was trying to help myself.  The want was there, I wanted my life to be different I just didn’t know how.

If that person...

Everyone keeps banging on about alcohol……. What’s the big deal?

I am going to go straight in with this. Alcohol is a drug (yes, it is).  A drug is something you put into your system (take, drink) that effects how you think and feel. And alcohol definitely does that.

It can make you feel relaxed, sleepy, excited, disinhibited, more sociable, loud, aggressive, slur your words, have trouble walking, suffer from incontinence, vomit, have hallucinations, paranoia, anxiety, sweating, shaking and the list goes on.  It has many effects on the body.

Alcohol is - a colourless volatile flammable liquid which is produced by the natural fermentation of sugars and is the intoxicating constituent of wine, beer, spirits, and other drinks, and is also used as an industrial solvent and as fuel.

If alcohol was re classified today it would be a class A drug up there with heroin and cocaine.

Apart from the obvious serious issues, there are many reasons why alcohol...

Top tips from others on how to live a happy healthy life, free from bad habits and addictions.

Most of my learning comes from working with and listening to thousands of people.  Yes, I have read the research and the books and taken part in a lot of training.  But nothing really compares to working with and listening to people that have done it.

People who have stopped and reduced: their drinking, their partying or their drug use and have changed their lives.  It doesn’t have to be people that have come back from the dead.  Everyone I have worked with has a story.  These are people from all walks of life: rich, poor, old, young. Getting into trouble with booze, drugs, food or gambling doesn’t discriminate. It doesn’t care if you work, whether you have money or where you come from.  It can effect anyone and everyone.

Here is a collection of some of my favourite little pieces of wisdom from those that have been there and are still doing...

I have quite a few people telling me in their early days that they are really struggling with being sober/alcohol free or taking a break.  It doesn’t matter what you call it. The issues are generally the same.

What happens is people come to me when something isn’t working in their life. 9 times out of 10 people are usually drinking too much, partying too much or taking too many drugs.

And it doesn’t necessarily mean there is a problem with that, it’s just something isn’t working.  Maybe they can’t sleep, their relationships not working, are feeling anxious and so on.  Alcohol, drugs, caffeine all these things can be a contributing factor.

We start by stripping it back.  Stop the drinking, the drug use, the excessive caffeine consumption, (I can hear you say why caffeine?) the thing with coffee and I mean weapons grade coffee which more of us our drinking now is, it’s a stimulant. It also comes in variable strengths, so...

Cravings 

A powerful desire for something, a hunger, a thirst, want, urge, need.

There are lots of different words that sum up how we feel about cravings.

People ask me about cravings all the time. When will they stop? When will they go? People seem to worry and panic about them.

Let’s get a few things straight.

People have cravings all the time for many different things and many different reasons.  I would go so  far as to say there is no rhyme or reason to them. 

Its ok, don’t panic, a craving won’t kill you.  It’s just a feeling, something that pops into your mind, a thought.

Think of it like an emotion.  You feel many different emotions throughout the day.  Happy, sad, thoughtful, angry, frustrated, elated, love.  The list is endless.

Most of us don’t react to every single feeling we have.  If you do then please get some help, you don’t need to be a slave to your emotions.

So, you are going to have...

You have reached a point where you just don’t want to drink all the time.  You want to get a grip on it.

You feel rough. You’ve lost your sparkle. Put on some extra weight. You feel a bit low. Life is a struggle.

Are you fed up with the hangovers? Those embarrassing days after when you try and figure out what you said or did?

It’s become a habit, a bad habit.

There could be many reasons why you are ready to just take a break.

You don’t need to have thought any further than that.

Here’s the good news, it’s good to take a break, not in a Rachel and Ross kind of way.  But in an I care about myself and my health kind of way.

Alcohol is a toxin a poison, same as if you were eating McDonald’s everyday or a big bag of sweets.  At some point, there is going to be some sort of effect on your health.

Or it may be as simple as that you have lost your bounce.

One of the biggest things I hear when I work with people when they first...

Last night a DJ saved my life, well actually it wasn’t the DJ it was the partner dancing.  Don’t ask me why but it did. 

I have always loved to dance, as a child I spent my time dressing up and choreographing routines to all my favourite records, from Abba to Edwin star and flight of the bumble bees.  Many a day spent in my leotard and disco glitter, closing my eyes and feeling the music, like only a child can. I never attended a dance class, something about our working class upbringing, we didn't do things like that when I was a kid. 

And as an adult I continued to go where the music and dancing took me.  

Then I had a difficult period in my life like we all do, after all that’s life.  Completely as a result of bad decisions I had made along the way.  To cut a long story short – I married the wrong man, a very difficult man and my life got tough for a long time. 

In the middle of it I reached an all time low, my...

I love peoples life stories, stories of change.

I find them inspiring. We can learn from each other.

Listen to Lillies story of change. She starts of quiet reticent as you can hear she feels bad about certain aspects of her past, but keep listening as there are some gems of advice in there.

https://soundcloud.com/stephanie-ichange21/extra-ordinary-people-podcast-2