I recently I asked my audience what can I help you with the most?

The biggest thing you want is more top tips for quitting.

I know I go on about booze a lot, for so many reasons, but essentially these tips can be translated for any substance that is causing you a problem in your life today.

I have many favourites as you know.

Eat healthy foods, don’t drink or take drugs, exercise, sleep, spend time with the people you love, laugh, be in nature.  You know all the simple things that we know work.  Fundamentals I call them.  Get your basics in place.

If you have trouble getting your basics in please work with a suitably experienced and qualified coach.  Seriously it will really help and save you so much time.

Are you ready, drum roll………

My number 1 tip for when you take a break, or stop using anything is get out there and do something different.

I mean it really.

I know it’s tough when you first stop and the last thing you want to do...

Ok let’s talk about social anxiety and how to socialize without drinking.

I am not a fan of labels, but you all know what I mean by social anxiety so I will use it. 

What I have seen in all my years of doing this work and living it, is that some people can really struggle with socialising when they are giving up alcohol, partying or drug use. 

Mostly this is just because they have been so used to socialising with. 

I think what has happened is as a society we acceptably use alcohol and other substances, although mostly alcohol as a social lubricant and to do business. 

It’s a given, it’s just what happens. We drink, we socialize. 

I don’t think people really realise that that’s what they are doing.  It isn’t a conscious thing.  It’s just you drink when you are out and about, most people do. So, it isn’t until you start giving up alcohol that you really notice this stuff. 

Are you...

Living in the moment; what does that really mean? And why is it a good thing.

People keep talking about it. But do you really know what it is and how to do it?

I love it when I talk to people about this and they just look at me confused.

Why? Why do I ask people to do this, or at least try it?

People come to me mostly because they are having problems with their drug or alcohol use.  Then it’s the life stuff that comes next.

How do you live when you aren’t drinking or partying?

What do people do? How do they cope when things don’t work out?

The answers to this are too big for a blog or even a book.  But maybe this will give you an idea of how to live in the moment, how to do it and what the benefits can be for you.

I got a text from a friend this morning.  He is in the middle of a big life change and is finding things really overwhelming, feeling very emotional with lots of feelings of guilt and shame.

There is so much going on, change,...

If you want to make changes to your life, you must do something different. Action is needed.

Yes, you can read books, do courses and learn from people.  Obviously, they are all good things to do.  But none of it matters unless you are willing to do something about it and try things. And that’s the bit where people get stuck.

The thing is we don’t know until we try, the only way is through.

In fact, I would say that’s how most of us learn, through doing.

For instance when you first learn to drive you have no idea what you are doing.  All of it seems weird, awkward, scary and confusing.  You have to think really hard, pay attention and concentrate.  You make mistakes, stall the car and kangaroo jump around the car park.  Maybe you even feel scared and anxious. Or have doubts about whether you will even be able to learn. Thoughts of “will I ever pass my test” or “will I kill someone” running through your head.

It...

Life its happening now, right this moment.

This moment will never happen again.

I struggle with the whole one life thing.  Not that I believe that anything else happens.  I don’t.  I do really think that’s it, curtains, the end, finito.

That’s the thing with death. It’s very final.

There is no coming back and saying, oh I just need to apologise to so and so, or tell someone you love them.

I don’t know about you though, but death makes me feel alive. It reminds me that, yes this is it.  So make it count.  Am I living how I really want to be living? Is my life working for me? If I was to die in 3 months what would I do?

Why the ramblings about life and death I hear you say.  Well my dad died recently. Hence why I have been a little quiet.  Although it’s sad, he was 71. He lived his life, he really did.  He travelled, was very active, very sociable and did what he wanted when he wanted.  A life to be...